Parenting in the Digital Age: Managing Kids Screen Time

Managing kids screen time isn’t as simple as saying no—it’s a constant dance of setting limits, adapting to their needs, and learning alongside them. Sometimes the best intentions meet real life, and we have to adjust. And that’s okay.

As a parent in today’s fast-paced digital world, I often find myself caught between my love for technology and the growing unease I feel about its impact on my kids. I’ve spent my career as a Software Engineer, surrounded by screens and systems—and yet, parenting through the tech landscape feels like an entirely different challenge. If you’ve ever felt the same, you’re not alone.

Before becoming a parent, I didn’t give much thought to the impact of screen time—on kids or even on adults. I’ve always loved technology. It’s a big part of my life, both professionally and personally. I spend hours each day surrounded by devices, apps, and digital tools, and it’s something I genuinely enjoy.

But everything shifted when I was pregnant with my son. As I prepared to bring a child into the world, I started learning more about the realities of growing up in today’s digital landscape. I read about how even background TV can affect infant development, how online bullying affects teens, and how social media can create impossible pressures on young minds. I was shaken.

The world our children are growing up in looks nothing like the one we knew. There were no Instagram followers or viral YouTube challenges in my school days—and honestly, I’m grateful for that. Looking back, I realize how lucky we were to navigate our childhoods without the added stress of a digital audience.

Learning about all of this deeply shaped my early parenting goals. I told myself: no YouTube until high school, no smartphones until 18. I wanted to delay it all as long as possible. And while I still plan to hold off on smartphones for as long as I can, the “no YouTube” rule didn’t last long once toddler hood hit.

My son is only six, but he already pretends to have a smartphone—mimicking our actions, asking about apps, and expressing curiosity about how it all works. I know the real ask is just around the corner. And I’m not prepared.

“Hey mum! Come check out this video of me and Bulbasaur, it’s on my phone. “

– My son, age 6, holding a pretend iphone in his hand. And yes, he is best buddies with all Pokemon!

Despite being tech-savvy myself, there’s something uniquely daunting about how kids engage with technology today. It’s immersive, intuitive, and often far beyond what we grew up with. And that gap makes it hard to know exactly how to protect them from the risks without completely cutting them off from the world they’re growing up in.

Our biggest challenge so far? YouTube. It started innocently—letting him watch a bit of Blippi on YouTube Kids in fullscreen mode with the search function disabled. But kids are clever. One day, he figured out how to exit fullscreen, and with that came the sidebar of video recommendations.

I was proud of his curiosity and technical know-how… but also a little terrified. Suddenly, what had been a tightly controlled space was now open to an algorithm I couldn’t fully trust. We tried our best to monitor, but even with the best intentions, things sometimes slipped through.

Some of the content on YouTube Kids left me deeply uncomfortable. I remember walking in on my son watching a video of someone unboxing toys from a massive pile. He was glued to the screen—completely entranced. When I suggested we switch to something else, he had a complete meltdown.

Even more concerning was what followed: changes in his behavior at home and even at preschool. More tantrums. More difficulty settling down. That’s when we made the decision to implement a full YouTube ban.

We allowed only Netflix or Disney+, and though the first few days were rocky, the transformation in his behavior was almost immediate. Fewer outbursts. Calmer days. More focused play. It reinforced what we had suspected: not all screen time is created equal.

After about a year, we began to slowly loosen the rules. Both my partner and I use YouTube regularly, and it felt increasingly unfair to deny him something he saw us using every day. So we had a conversation with him—clear, honest, and respectful. The new rule was simple: if we say a video isn’t okay, it needs to be switched off, or YouTube goes away again.

So far, this approach has worked well. Our son mostly watches videos of people playing video games, and either my partner or I vet the creator first. If it’s someone new, we watch together and talk about what’s happening.

One day, he watched a video of a game called “Who’s Your Daddy?”, where players take on roles as babies trying to injure themselves and a clueless dad trying to stop them. We used it as a teaching moment. I asked questions: “Do you think that’s okay?”, “What might happen in real life if someone did that?” It opened the door to some surprisingly thoughtful conversations.

At the end of that video, the creators said, “If you don’t subscribe to our channel, that means you like eating poo!” A joke, yes—but also a manipulation. I explained to my son that the creators were trying to trick him into subscribing, so their channel would grow and they’d make more money. We talked about what that meant, and why it’s important to be thoughtful online—even about silly things.

Even when you manage to keep certain content out of your home, it often finds a way in through friends and peers. That’s how my son first learned about Huggy Wuggy from Poppy Playtime—a creepy horror character introduced to him by a friend at daycare. He was three years old at the time, could recognize the toy in stores, and wanted one badly. He didn’t find it scary at all.

These moments are reminders that we can’t parent in a vacuum. We have to stay engaged, aware, and willing to have ongoing conversations with our kids about what they see and hear—because they are always listening and learning.

Parenting in the digital age means being as curious and adaptable as our kids. We have to be willing to learn, set boundaries, and—perhaps most importantly—admit when we don’t have all the answers. It’s not about eliminating tech from their lives. It’s about guiding them through it with wisdom, openness, and care.

I know it’s easier said than done. That’s why I created this website—to share what I’m learning as I explore the digital spaces my children will grow into. If you’ve made it this far, thank you. I’m so glad you’re here. My hope is that by sharing our experiences, we can help each other become more present, informed, and compassionate parents in our kids’ digital futures.

Have you faced similar challenges with managing your kids screen time? I’d love to hear your story—feel free to share in the comments or connect with me directly. We’re all figuring this out together.

Erin Crocker

I’ve spent my career as a Software Engineer, surrounded by screens and systems—and yet, parenting through the tech landscape feels like an entirely different challenge. If you’ve ever felt the same, you’re not alone.

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